Journal: Dancing with Death in the City of Light
Morning prayers, cleansing rituals - a common sight walking the ghats of Maa Ganga
Varanasi, India.
YS 1.1 Atha yoga-anusasanam
‘Now this is Yoga as I have perceived it in the natural world.’
| Yoga Sutras of Patanjali.
It has been more than two years since visiting this ancient city, known as the oldest inhabited city of India. I think the fact that this photo above has served as my phone screen saver is a testament in itself of the impact of learning and growth that alchemised during my 11 night stay. Seeing this window of time more as an intense rite of passage, like an initiation of piercing yet another dusty layer of the veil of illusion - my experience with the mythological abode of Lord Siva had undoubtedly imprinted on me considerably.
It was within the walls of Varanasi’s old city streets where the opening, foundational commentary of Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras had weaved its tangible teachings from suggested mind food into the material culinary experience that my sensations had me process intensely through sight, sound, smell, taste, touch and innate feeling.
Arriving with the approach of taking each day as it comes, what ended up potentially being a two/three day stay had turned to almost a fortnight of what now feels like a whirlwind of a dream. The infinite depth and layers of sacred meaning and symbolism that the Hindu deity of Siva also known as Adiyogi ( Sankrit term encompassing meaning of first Yogi ), is a lifetime endeavour study in itself. Suffice to day, that with a love and respect of mythology and cultural symbology, the story of Varanasi had caught my attention three months prior. Seeing and hearing of someones experience had awakened a more bold and audacious side of me that wanted to experience a sensorial and spiritual intensity that I had not yet surrendered to. With a roof over my head in a room that has come to be fondly remembered as ‘the monk room,’ I was hosted by two brothers - Kailash and Shiva during my stay at ‘ Shiva Guest House.’ With no agenda other than to immerse myself fully in the happenings of this vibrant city, my first outing was a few minutes on foot away to the main place of ritual for the nightly ceremony of Aarti at Dashashwamedh Ghat. Meandering through the streets with a feeling of preparedness for ‘ anything and everything ’ as was recommended by an Indian local lover of this city - I had come to the famous ghat (a passage leading down to a river) a little earlier before the crowds came. With all of my senses stimulated and stretched at this point, I was ready to partake in witnessing the acts of devotion and reverence of pilgrims and priests who had gathered to honour the holy river Ganga. Encompassing celebratory rituals of prayer that included chanting, smoke, fire, music and choreographed movements - my sense of aliveness was activated ! Additionally so, by watching a foreign man lay down on his belly in front of me, vomiting nearby under a wooden slat (the only ounce of free space within the open-aired vicinity). It was the most densely packed environment besides the peak hour train rides in Mumbai that I had found myself in a month before. Here I was surrounded by family gatherings, fellow foreigners socialising, mischievous looking characters scanning the crowded atmospheres opportunities, and many figures embodying an ecstatic state of Bhakti ( Sanskrit term encompassing loving devotion to divinity). There was a feeling of deep knowing that I was exactly where I was meant to be.
Each night informal and formal ceremonies illuminate the ghats with candles, lights and fire - where there was space was the chance to offer Puja (Sanskrit term encompassing acts of worship). Considered as one of the holiest places in Hinduism, I felt as if everywhere I walked was a shrine. Throughout the winding cow and dog filled alleyways, there was always a reference to the divine wisdom. Within nooks and crannies among hole in the wall corners and borders of buildings, I had come across statues of deities and many a priest or caretaker ensuring the sanctity and cleanliness of this shrine was upheld. Constantly coming across the symbolic reminders of spiritual consciousness through sighting statues of Lord Ganesha, Goddess Durga, Lord Hanuman-ji and many many more, my perception of the power of prayer and ritual was changing… Fast forward to the end of my stay, a local man had shared his sentiment of Varanasi - that the intensity of spirituality attracts not only the greatest of saintly people, but also the greatest of sinners to the city. I like to consider that these reverential reminders that seem like the foundation upon which the city is built, can serve as ways of which people from all walks of life can carry a consciousness that acknowledges the power of peace that faith and belief in a universal compassionate truth of a collective seeking love and beauty external to personal identity, can contribute to inner and outer harmony.
The ‘ Burning Ghats ’ of Varanasi refer to the highly sacred cremation grounds upon which a constant funeral pyre burns 24/7. Encounters through momentary exchanges and longer discussions with many a locals had informed me of the belief in that the cremation of a body in the banks of river Ganges in Varanasi ends the cyclical wheel of birth and rebirth, reaching the state of Moksha ( Sanskrit term encompassing Soul liberation) - ending the karmic wheel of reincarnation. A belief so strong that those living outside of India have been known to organise special instructions for their remains to be sent to this sacred place of salvation.
It never ceases to surprise me how generous and honest people are with sharing their beliefs and faith with me, especially in India. One man standing in solitude watching the funeral rites taking place had shared with me that he likes to sit there often, as a reminder to be happy and thankful to be alive. He had shared that Varanasi was not a city of death, but a city that celebrates life. It would be difficult to not notice the abundant sources of the image of Lord Siva in the form of Lord Nataraj, the ‘Cosmic Dancer.’ Signifying the natural cycle of transformation that requires creation, preservation and destruction - the particular teachings of this deity is symbolised by the fiery ring of purification of life’s journey through the many layers of thresholds these initiatory painful and pleasurable portals within the human experience offer.
I had come across an unexpected personable, funny and humble teacher, one whose teachings and impressions influence my energy work and practices today. The meeting of this this teacher had started by being led by my inner compass that had at first brought me to what looked like an abandoned yoga studio where a man was sleeping. I was suddenly being invited into a practice space where this sleeping mans brother was the yoga teacher I was looking for but was not to be present any time soon. Inviting me to follow my curiosity into the yogic posters, statues and teachings scattered around the room - a few minutes later I was being serenaded by a beautiful chanting of a mantra dedicated to the sacredness of Maa Ganga just outside the window by the same man. A simple yet insightful conversation followed, where personal opinion of ; how the practice of yoga has and continues to evolve, as well as how the nature of belief and spirituality is embodied in this ‘city of light.’ Moving on from this practice space and invited for chai, we were both walking towards a part of a city I hadn’t yet explored. Arriving at a modest yet wonderfully located hole in the wall chai shop with a picturesque small view looking out onto the ganga, I listened to two old friends converse in their local language, with my freshly made chai-filled terracotta tumbler in hand. It made me smile knowing that at that moment I felt safe and secure in myself, aware of the processes required to test the waters of my intuitive guide of who to trust and where to position myself within an environment unfamiliar to me. As a natural end to this spontaneous, richly insightful and respectful encounter - I had parted ways with this rare exchange of calm and collected scene of the old city, ready to walk down unassuming streets northward.
Walking down one particular street, a white washed wall at the end had caught my eye - yet again I followed my curiosity, walking through the threshold where a clean and tidy staircase embellished with yogic and hermetic symbology led to a closed yet welcoming door. I was standing outside a small ashram of a local Yoga healer and teacher who dedicated his life to providing alternative healthcare within a clean and safe and small vicinity, offering a spiritual holistic approach to community services and education.
A year prior, I had began to practicing energy work to support my yoga teaching class offerings, having trained Reiki Level 1 and Level 2 Certification of the Usui Method with Wiebke Queisser at Yogatime, Bondi Beach. Little did I know that stumbling across this ashram would be the reason I stayed in Varanasi for the seven days ahead before my flight to Kathmandu, to further add to my preliminary learning of energy based body work. For seven days I spent my mornings and later afternoons in company with a nurse from Germany who was deepening her path of sound healing and energy healing practices. With a 99% practical and 1% theoretical approach to learning with our dear teacher Umesh, I was working with how to strengthen the connection with my intuitive muscle, one that required sensitivity of feeling, patience, focused intention and most importantly - commitment to consistency. Through the practice of offering and receiving energy healing with my fellow peer, I again had found myself in a learning environment - deepening the scope of my healing offerings through consistent practical efforts of energetic self-cleaning and of cleaning the energetic field of a peer turned dear friend during this seven day course. It was a seven day course that felt like a purification of limiting beliefs and habit patterns within my psyche, that supported my shifting of energetic blueprints that were no longer serving me - a detox on all levels. The end of this story is sweetened and savoured by the fact that all that my peer and I had learned was to be offered through the practical offerings of karma yoga ( Sanskrit term encompassing selfless - service) to our teachers community of local children and economically disadvantaged members who lived nearby.
Dancing with death in the city of light is how I would best describe the spiritual practicum hosted and held in embrace within Varanasi. A place in which I was to test the teachings of my studies and trainings completed so far - as if a yardstick for my sensorial state of awareness that would measure my sharpness as well as humble me greatly time and time again, through the reminder that consciousness is ever expanding, evolving in its infinitely layered process.
‘Now this is Yoga as I have perceived it in the natural world ’ - YS 1.1 acknowledges that the the window of opportunity to ‘ practice’ yoga and to experience the state of yoga is available at any given moment in any given place. That in order to develop on this journey of inner and outer harmony, the practitioner must be willing to experiment first-hand through lifes trials, tribulations and triumphs, testing the boundary lines of the trust and faith in one’s own abilities and in lifes mysterious beauty.
